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Watch out little legs. My lanky ones are after you! – Special Occasions #3

This is Laura McHarrie’s 40th evaluated speech and the penultimate tick in the box towards Advanced Speaker Gold.  She was the first member of Casterbridge Speakers having persuaded Steve Graham to sponsor a new club in Dorchester. In this, its 10th year, Steve has been pivotal in maintaining the standard of the club and its sustainability.  His Distinguished Toastmaster journey has taken place however, in fits and starts and Laura is now edging slightly ahead of her mentor in her own journey.  Will Stevie rise to Laura’s challenge and finish off his last three speeches and beat her to the DTM finish line before Salisbury Speakers charters?

With her Roast entitled    Watch out little legs.  My lanky ones are after you! Please welcome Laura McHarrie …

Although over the years he has never been my official ‘mentor’ Stevie Graham is the one I have … always ‘looked up to’!!!  I have known him for some time so it’s been a tall order trying to ‘shrink’ all my material – into 3-5 minutes. 

Lady President, Mr Toastmaster, Fellow Toastmasters. I’ll start at the beginning. Many years ago Steve was born … on the 4th June … and of course that would make him a gemini twin but no no no!  Stevie, by his own reckoning has multiple personalities.  Let’s take a closer look …

Stevie Graham.002.jpg

I’m not saying that he is diminutive; I’m just saying I think he has seven personalities.

  • Doc  – the know it all – our Toastmaster encyclopedia
  • Happy – always! When he is a contest winner
  • Dopey – sometimes, but only and only when he’s had one too many beers!
  • Bashful, – not sure about this? Just watch him wobble on THIS pedestal tonight
  • Sneezy, – [SNEEZE] when he covers up a mistake – ops! Sorry I mean one of his very rare and unusual mistakes!
  • Sleepy, – just like a sleeping policeman waiting to catch us out and become …
  • Grumpy, – especially if he is general evaluator or worse chief judge!  You know what I mean by the tut, the frown and the look!

There are however, some real life Giants to whom, I think he makes a more worthy comparison …

Stevie Graham.004.jpgErnie Wise.  The perfect straight-man to Eric Morcambe with impeccable timing and the perfect pause.  As Eric might have said “Appreciate the little things in life.  Give a Ern a hug”. 

Then there is little Charlie Chaplin – the body language buff.  You can just see STEVE as the leading man in The Immigrant – he is from Australia after all!  We all know of his slapstick fist fight (on top of a ladder) with an enormous red-backed spider which he loses … much to his disgust.  The subsequent tumble leaving him with a disintegrated elbow and one arm short than the other.  Brilliant!

Last but by no means least is the imagination of Ronnie Corbett and his shaggy dog stories – our Stevie is a past master at table topics and can spin a yarn – using up every second of his two and a half minutes.

I mean, this is the guy who flew back from Timbuktu in a microlight in hurricane winds in the dark with nothing but a mankini on to hide his modesty.  He had zero fuel!  And yet he negotiated the landing and still arrived safe and sound.

We need more Stevie Graham SHORT stories.  We haven’t heard any for ages.  We want to hear them and we want to hear them …NOW!

Stevie Graham –  You are the Ronnie Corbett, story-teller, the Charlie Chaplin body language buff, and above them all, the Ernie Wise straight man with short, fat, hairy legs.

Forget Disney’s dwarfs, you are our giant, please be upstanding for your final roast – oh sorry!  you already are!

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